Wednesday, April 9, 2014

Manic morning and milestones


 

Mornings are hectic here.  Mostly because I am not a morning person. I feel like it’s not natural to get out of bed before the sun is even up. I put off actually getting out of bed until the last possible minute. The last possible minute in my house is almost exactly 25 minutes before my son gets picked up for school. I’m sure if I had a full hour to get everything and everyone up and dressed the morning would be much less hectic. However I will take those chaotic 25 minutes and be happy with my extra 35 minutes in bed and be resigned to the fact that this is what I have asked for.

Alarm goes off for the 5th time. That’s the real get out of bed alarm. The rest are just kind of like PSA testing to see if anyone can actually hear it. I wake Aidan up first. He usually ignores me and lays in bed mumbling about how I am the meanest mother on the planet for the next 10 minutes. While Aidan has a private pity party under his covers I wash my face and brush my teeth knowing that his whining will become increasingly louder because he thinks I’m not paying attention which will in turn wake Seark up. Seark fortunately greets every day with a smile. If both of them woke up the way Aidan does I would probably just stay in bed and forget out the whole formal education thing. Kidding. Definitely kidding because homeschooling is also not an option. Ever. Rylan seems to have internal alarm clock, something I envy, that wakes him up at the same time every day. Once everyone is up we head down stairs.

15 minutes until Aidan has to leave for school. I will spend the next 10 minutes getting Seark a “hot” bottle. Yes my almost three year old still drinks a bottle in the morning. Judge away. It won’t bother me… or change our morning routine.  After I get Seark a bottle and get his cartoons on I make Aidan his breakfast and let him eat it on the couch. Next make lunch for Aidan to take to school. Last make sure he has everything he needs for the day as I ask for the hundredth or so time to GET DRESSED!!!! I GAVE YOU THE CLOTHES WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOU DON’T KNOW WHAT YOU ARE SUPPOSED TO WEAR. YOUR SOCKS WERE WITH YOUR CLOTHES JUST LIKE THEY ALWAYS ARE!!! YES AIDAN YOU HAVE TO WEAR SOCKS TO SCHOOL….. BECAUSE YOUR FEET WILL GET STINKY WITH OUT THEM…. I DON’T KNOW WHY SOCKS KEEP YOUR FEET FROM GETTING STINKY JUST PUT THEM ON!!!!

All of this is happening while Rylan waits sometimes patiently in his rocker… sometimes not so patiently. This morning Rylan was having a not so patient morning. As usual I give him a toy to keep him occupied. Most mornings it just lays by his side as we watches me like hawk complaining until I pick him. This morning something else happened. I got him a toy. Put it in front of him and…. He picked it. He stopped crying and held the toy just inches away from him nose. He inspected in for a good five minutes. In this five minutes that he was quiet and content and curious I should have finished everything I had to do. Nope. Instead I stood there watching Ry discover something. He had seen this particular toy a dozen or so times before but today was the first day he really took notice of it. I watched him twist and turn it, try to shove it in his mouth, pull it close to his and push it away. Inevitably he got bored with this discovery.

My mind drifted back to when Aidan was an infant. I remember watching him discover things for the first time and that being one of my favorite things about being a mom. This unique experience that only I for the most part got to witness. I wondered for a minute how many of these moments I had already overlooked with Rylan simply because I was busy with the other kids. How many of these moments had I missed with Aidan because I didn’t know to look for them? When Aidan was a baby I was so wrapped up in the miles stone events like rolling over, sitting up, babbling, walking, I wonder how many of the mini milestones I didn’t see because they weren’t something the dr. was going to ask me about, because I didn’t read them in a monthly newsletter that defined whether or not my baby was “normal”, “within range”, “on track”.

Having three kids I have learned to that each baby will do things in their own time. Not to waste time wishing time away waiting for the next milestone. When Aidan was a baby I remember like almost every first time mom I have ever met waiting, wanting so badly for him to say his first word, take his first step. He did. Earlier than most. I felt like his accomplishments were also mine. I was that proud mom who thought my early walker articulate talker was the among the gifted and talented baby geniuses. I remember feeling relieved that he did these things with such ease. In the last seven years with another baby in between I have changed. My views have changed. I still look forward all the milestones but I am also aware of what else they signify. Each new beginning is also the end of a chapter in a book I don’t ever want to finish. Milestones are bittersweet. Even the ones only a mom recognizes. They make you pause or make you want to press pause.  Each day that passes my babies grow. Seark won’t drink a bottle forever (I hope)… Rylan will make new discoveries everyday… and there will even be a time where I will be missing hectic mornings with my boys. It is true life can pass you by while you are busy doing other things. Don’t let it.

And while lost in my thoughts time once again got away from and Aidan will be late for school… again.

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