Aside from that fact that this brutal winter has kept us home bound Aidan now has a cold. He's 8. 8years old and displays the typical characteristics of a grown man with a cold, the dramatic theatrics. He's just too weak to get off the couch and help himself to a glass of juice but has enough energy to taunt and wrestle his brother. Which of course means he is next in line for the cold that Aidan currently has. It appears that Rylan has already caught it. So if nothing else this day will consist of snot and tears. And as much as I don't really care for either I can deal with it.
But the day has so much more in store for us. Boredom.... cabin fever.... whatever you want to call has brought out the worst in these boys. Rylan... who is admittedly my favorite at the moment.... I know... I know.... you aren't supposed to have favorites but he's currently then only that doesn't talk which also means he can't talk back. And for that I love him. Aidan its seems lately has mastered sarcasm. And perfected his persistence on getting the last word in. The very last sarcastic word. And today it seems as though he is hell bent on sharpening his skills.
The more he talks back... the more I sound like my mother. I find myself saying the same things to him that she did to me when I was a fresh 8 year old. I remember how ridiculous she sounded to me back then and know that he feels the same way about me. As much as the words that come out of his mouth make cringe nothing gets under my skin more than the eye rolling! I suddenly understand my mother in a way I never thought I could.
Then there is Seark. He's so cute. He mumbles all day long with that binky stuffed in face so you can barely make out a word he says. And just when I am questioning whether or not to call the speech pathologist to get him evaluated he takes that thing out and says MOM I SAID I WANT PEANUT BUTTER AND JELLY NOW! clear as a bell. Seark for the most part is in his own little world. He does everything at his own pace. He's my little couch potato. If he was the first child I probably would have been concerned about his level of laziness.... seriously questioned his ability to be content with doing absolutely nothing... like all of the time. But he isn't the first... he is the second of three and I totally appreciate how much easier he makes my life. Very little bothers Seark... except for Aidan.
Aidan sees boredom as an opportunity to entertain himself by taunting his brother. Seark does an amazing job at tuning him out for an extended period of time... which I marvel at. I literally need zanax to have the same amount of patience. Then like a switch Aidan will do one last thing that will make Seark flip. Send him into a fit of rage. And then there is no stopping him. I used to spend my time taking turns yelling out them. Separating them. Putting them in time out in opposite corners of the house. Not anymore. I let them carry on as they wish. Eventually they will wear each other down. But not today. Today is one of those days... where the fighting started way too early and there is no end in sight.
As an added bonus Ry is getting to an age where he wants to join in the "fun". Ever watch the Muppets? Remember animal? That's my Ry... a little baby animal. He's entered what we have dubbed the puppy phase. Whenever he isn't getting his way or wants his brothers' attention he resorts to biting. Mostly poor Seark. Ry also likes to climb. On EVRYTHING. Every time I turn around he is trying to or already has gotten on top of something and the worst thing you can do is make eye contact at that point because regardless of where he is he will try to run... which results in a fall.
So its 7pm. Its been a long day of spilling drinks and dumping buckets of toys... over and over again. They have been climbing and biting and fighting for hours on end.... and I just can't take it anymore. And then it happened... like in the movie "A Christmas Story" when the Ralphie says "fuuuuuuuuuudge" only he didn't really say fudge. Aidan was continuing his taunting antics. Seark was whining and crying and telling Aidan to leave him alone... and then clear as day. With the binky still firmly in place he said it... STOP. IT. YOU..... FUCKER!
It was as if we were all jolted with a stun gun. What?! Seark!!!! What did you just say?! He repeated with just as much conviction the second time. And while I can't say I really even blame him... we don't condone that kind of language.... well not from our 3 year old anyway. On the verge of getting hysterical with either tears or laughter I sent them both to bed. Probably the earliest I have sent them to bed and to my surprise they both went to sleep with in minutes. Which of course made me question if I should send them to bed at this time every night... I am aware already that this is just wishful thinking.
By 8 pm the entire house was quiet. My husband had fallen asleep on the couch. All the kids were sound asleep in their own bed. So I poured myself a glass of wine and resumed my nightly ritual of binge watching parenthood... and all I could hear in the back of my mind was Seark's sweet little voice... STOP. IT. YOU. FUCKER! and although I know I should be appalled I can't help but laugh. Which can only mean 2 things I am so sleep deprived and crazy from being cooped up in this house that I am delirious and that I totally need to rethink my parenting.... okay one more I might want to stop cursing in front of the kids.
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